When I first started this article, I was frustrated with the school’s dress code, finding many aspects unnecessary and demeaning towards the female body; specifically, the rule banning exposed shoulders. I have been “dress coded” for wearing an off-the-shoulder top, where my shoulder and bra strap were slightly exposed and seen as unacceptable. In my progressive political mind, I challenged this concept. What is so distracting about my shoulders? And what is the problem with a bra strap showing? Nearly every girl wears a bra — why can’t these things be normalized? At the time, I interpreted this part of the dress code as discriminatory towards women and their bodies.

That was until I brought my concerns to the Dean of Students, Rundles. I expressed my confusion over the dress code and the three-finger strap rule, especially as someone who loves to wear my spaghetti strap tops when it’s 80 degrees outside. Rundles answered, “The three-finger rule is technically a rule that is there; however, I want to make sure I don’t have teachers coming up to students and putting them in an uncomfortable situation, like putting three-fingers near them [the student]. To me, that’s uncomfortable for the faculty and the student, but more so the student.” She continued, “For smaller straps, the hard part is when you can’t distinguish between it being a strap and a bra strap. I don’t want a faculty member to have to get into a conversation with a student with regard to that because that gets uncomfortable.”

This changed my perspective; maybe this rule wasn’t against women but more as a way to protect us. I followed up by asking: What is so harmful about seeing a bra strap? Rundles responded, “It’s a part of our actual dress code that we aren’t supposed to see undergarments.” She stated that exposing undergarments is unprofessional and explained another purpose of the dress code, which is to prepare students for the real world.

But why are certain clothes deemed unprofessional? As early as 12 years old, I wondered why exposing certain parts of my body was wrong. For example, there were times when I would wear a crop top, exposing my stomach; I wanted to be in with the trends at the time. But, I was never allowed out of the house in this outfit since I was “asking for attention,” and such clothes would make people want to look at me. I was just a 12-year-old who was confident in her body, wanting to look and feel good in my outfit.

Unfortunately, society’s view of clothing and women relates back to dress codes in schools and businesses. Shoulders, stomachs, and thin straps are all viewed as unprofessional and inappropriate–even though everyone shares the same body parts. I wondered to myself: Why are they seen as unprofessional? What’s so wrong with exposing a bra strap?

Society still holds many patriarchal views, such as the idea of women needing to cover up to “avoid” men from looking at them. In this case, they aren’t dressing for themselves but for men. Even in multiple rape and sexual assault cases throughout the U.S., there have been instances where it is assumed the woman gave consent since she was wearing an outfit that was “asking for sex.” That is far from the truth. Women should be able to dress for themselves and feel confident in their own skin. They should not have to cover up because some men cannot control their gaze. Yet, having our stomachs and shoulders exposed is considered unbusinesslike because of this reason. Rundles acknowledged this, saying, “We live in this society, so it’s unfortunate that this is the truth. That’s why I want to live in a reality where we can’t keep everyone in a bubble, let everyone do whatever, and then send you out into the world because that’s not fair. I don’t want that for you.”

Many of my questions remain unanswered. Society continues to baffle me, especially how a woman’s freedom of expression can be limited by the judgment that comes along with a piece of clothing. While I struggle to understand the world at large, my conversation with Rundles helped me realize that our dress code is mainly put in place to protect us from uncomfortable situations outside of our LFA bubble.

There are still aspects that need to be improved; for example, how teachers go about dress-coding students and how they could find themselves discriminating against certain body types. I have heard stories of teachers singling out a student for what they are wearing, inappropriately addressing their body parts instead of the piece of clothing, or dress coding a student based on the shape of their body. If a student ever felt offended by the way a teacher dress-coded them, Rundles encouraged, “The student definitely needs to say something to someone, whether that’s their advisor or a trusted adult. That’s where Mr. Makovec and I can sit down and have a conversation with a faculty member.”